Finding Balance: A Therapist’s Perspective on Food, Fuel, and Freedom in Athletics
Hi, I’m Shailyn—most people call me Shai. As a former university athlete, I understand the unique challenges and transitions that come with the world of sports. Now, as a therapist, I specialize in supporting athletes—whether they’re currently competing, or transitioning out of sport.
I’ve worked with athletes at every level, from beginners to Olympians, helping them navigate the mental and emotional aspects of their journeys. My goal is always to honor the person behind the athlete and empower them to thrive in every stage of life.
Today we are having a real conversation about food, fuel, and the fine line between healthy eating and disordered patterns. As a therapist and former university athlete myself, I’ve seen so many athletes struggle with their relationship with food, often in ways they don’t openly talk about. If you’re feeling like your approach to food has become complicated, or maybe even a source of stress, you’re not alone. Let’s explore this together with honesty, compassion, and some ideas that might be helpful.
The Emotional and Psychological Side of Disordered Eating in Athletes
As athletes, food is more than just something you eat when you're hungry. It’s fuel, it’s training support, it’s recovery, and sometimes, it’s a measure of discipline. These are all good things, but when we attach too much meaning to food—especially in ways that are tied to our identity or sense of self-worth—it can become complicated.
Many athletes face what I call the "silent stress" around eating. There can be subtle but intense pressures to look a certain way, hit specific weight targets, or follow strict food rules to “perform better.” And sometimes, these pressures come from a good place: the desire to be disciplined, to be the best version of yourself, or to honor your commitment to the sport. But if the way you eat is starting to feel rigid, stressful, or something you’re constantly monitoring, it might be worth taking a closer look.
Disordered eating can be subtle. It might look like:
Skipping a meal because you feel guilty about what you ate earlier.
Feeling anxious if a meal isn’t “perfectly clean” or “allowed.”
Ignoring hunger cues because you’re trying to maintain a specific weight or appearance.
Feeling compelled to exercise harder if you think you “overate.”
Feeling like you need to earn your food through exercise.
Truthfully, a healthy relationship with food should feel more like balance and nourishment, rather than control or self-criticism. If any of this resonates with you, remember that it doesn’t make you “bad” or “wrong.” Many athletes experience these feelings, and understanding them can be the first step to changing them.
The Impact of Sports-Related Pressures on Food Behaviours
In competitive sports, there’s an unspoken expectation to push through, stay disciplined, and even to make sacrifices. For many, this means paying careful attention to food and body weight as part of the regimen. But here’s the thing: While fueling properly is vital, sometimes these goals can start to erode a healthy relationship with food and even with yourself.
When you’re constantly focused on food as a means to improve your performance, it can create a hyper-focus on perfection—perfect macros, perfect weight, perfect meal timing. But over time, this perfectionism can backfire, leading to stress, guilt, and even burnout. Also, what we think is “perfect” often changes with new trends or guidance, meaning the goalposts are always moving.
It’s okay to question these pressures. Ask yourself: Is my approach to food helping me feel stronger, more energized, and at peace? Or is it making me feel stressed, restricted, or like I’m never enough? Remember, food is just one part of the big picture in your athletic journey. Your body and mind need more than nutrients; they need kindness, flexibility, and balance to truly thrive.
Building a Healthier Relationship with Food
So, how do we work toward a healthier relationship with food? Keep in mind, these are very generalized, as individual sessions would be needed to explore how this could apply specifically to you, but here are some approaches that might help you find peace with food while still fueling your goals.
Embrace Food as a Partner in Your Performance, Not a Measure of Your Worth
Food is there to support your journey, not to dictate your value or identity as an athlete. Try to view meals as opportunities to strengthen and care for your body, not just as a box to check or something to get "right." Reflect on the ways food fuels your passion and the positive impact it has on your performance. By framing food as a supportive partner, you can start to release the pressure of perfection.Tune into Your Body’s Cues and Needs
Athletes are often told exactly how much to eat and when, which can disconnect you from your body’s natural signals. Challenge yourself to get curious about what your body is telling you. Are you hungry, thirsty, low on energy? Just as you listen to your body to avoid injury, listening to your hunger, fullness, and energy levels can help you establish a more intuitive approach to eating.Practice Self-Compassion Around Food Choices
Self-compassion is critical. Not every meal has to be “ideal” or meet all your performance goals to be nourishing and valuable. If you’re hard on yourself for missing a target or eating something outside of your “plan,” take a deep breath and remind yourself that flexibility is part of a healthy, sustainable approach. You are more than your diet, and each meal is simply a moment in time—not a reflection of your commitment or capability as an athlete. Counselling can help you learn skills to reframe these thoughts in a compassionate way.Reflect on Your “Why” Behind Food Choices
Take a moment to explore your motivations behind food choices. Are they truly about fueling your body, or are they about meeting an external expectation or ideal? Checking in with yourself—asking questions like, “Am I choosing this for me, or because I feel I ‘should’?”—can help you reconnect with a sense of autonomy around food.Challenge the All-or-Nothing Mindset
In sports, the mindset can often be “all or nothing.” But eating doesn’t have to be that way. Recognize that one meal, one day, or even a few indulgences aren’t going to derail your performance. Building consistency over time and allowing yourself some freedom can actually help your performance, reducing burnout and helping you feel more at ease in your daily life.
My Role as a Therapist in Your Relationship with Food
As an athlete, your relationship with food can feel like a constant balancing act. That’s where I come in. I specialize in helping athletes like you unpack the challenges around food, body image, and perfectionism, creating space for healing, self-awareness, and sustainable habits.
Here’s How I Can Support You:
A Safe Space for Vulnerability: Athletes are often seen as strong and disciplined, which can make it hard to admit struggles with food or body image. In our work together, I’ll provide a judgment-free space where you can be open and honest about what you’re experiencing. By validating your feelings and normalizing your challenges, I’ll help you feel less isolated and more empowered to make meaningful changes.
Understanding the ‘Why’ Behind Your Choices: Do you find yourself sticking to strict food rules or chasing unattainable ideals? Together, we’ll explore what’s driving your eating patterns—whether it’s a need for control, external expectations, or something deeper. This awareness is the first step toward making choices rooted in self-care rather than fear or pressure.
Reframing Perfectionism: Perfectionism creates stress and rigidity. I’ll help you challenge all-or-nothing thinking and embrace flexibility. Together, we’ll redefine success as consistency and progress, not perfection, so you can feel more balanced and at ease.
Connecting to Your Body’s Signals: Have you lost touch with your hunger, fullness, or energy cues? I’ll guide you in reconnecting with these natural signals using mindfulness-based approaches. Learning to trust your body again can shift your relationship with food from rigid rules to intuitive and nourishing choices.
Supporting the Bigger Picture: Food challenges often connect to other areas of life, like stress, anxiety, or self-esteem. I’ll help you address these underlying factors, giving you the foundation to build a healthier relationship with yourself—and your sport.
If you’re ready to explore a new way of thinking about food, your body, and your performance, I’m here to help. Together, we’ll create a path toward balance, resilience, and freedom that aligns with both your goals and your well-being.
How To Connect
If you’re an athlete looking to improve your relationship with food, manage the pressures of competition, or simply find balance in your life, I’d love to support you. Here’s how we can connect:
Email Me: Have questions? Send me a message at shailyn@thesolaceflow.com. I personally respond to every email and would be happy to explore how I can support you.
Explore More Resources: Visit my website, www.thesolaceflow.com, where you’ll find additional insights, blog posts, and tools to help you on your journey.
Book a Session: Ready to dive in? You can schedule a session directly through my online booking platform: Book Now. I offer 15-minute FREE consults to discuss any questions you may have too. Whether it’s your first time reaching out or you’re continuing your mental health journey, I’m here to meet you where you are.
You don’t have to navigate these challenges alone. Let’s work together to build the balance, resilience, and freedom you deserve.
